- How to Support Your Partner
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Struggling with a chronic illness such as diabetes, arthritis, multiple sclerosis, Alzheimer’s disease, or cancer can put a strain on even the best relationship. If your partner has a chronic illness, you can combat feelings of frustration and helplessness with patience, commitment, and open communication.
Here are 7 ways you and your partner can successfully navigate the stresses of a chronic health issue and take care of each others’ needs.
7 ways to help your partner with a chronic illness
1. Communicate with each other
With any relationship, whether or not chronic illness is involved, honest and open communication is key. Expressing your feelings to your partner can help you avoid feeling detached from your loved one, and talking about potential solutions to problems can help you work together as a team.
2. Talk about each partner’s needs
Chronic illness can easily shift the balance of a relationship. Your partner may experience a blow to their low self-esteem due to having to rely on your help. You may at times feel overwhelmed by the responsibilities of caretaking and feel resentful if your needs aren’t being met. Discuss each partner’s needs and remember that each person in the relationship is equally important. Figure out how each can take care of each other in different ways.
3. Accept that some situations will be stressful
Dealing with a chronic illness can be unpredictable, and you may have to accept the fact that you may not be able to anticipate or control every situation that arises. Do everything you can to educate yourself about the disease and available options for treatment, but learn to let go of what you cannot control.
4. Take care of your own health
While caring for your partner is important, caring for yourself is crucial as well. If you neglect your own health, you may burn out and be unable to help your loved one. Studies have shown that spouses who are caregivers are much more likely to experience:
- Fear of the future
- Depression and/or anxiety
- Deterioration in intimacy
- Fatigue and sleep deprivation
- Social disruption
- Financial difficulties
- Emotional toll on health due to stress
Make time for yourself to go for a walk, get a workout in, meet up with friends, or simply take a break to avoid harming your own physical and mental health.
5. Avoid isolating yourself
Chronic illness can be isolating, and it can make you and your partner depressed if you don’t have strong friendships to help you feel supported. Plan and follow through on social engagements and family get-togethers as much as possible.
6. Address financial problems
Having a spouse or partner with a chronic illness can cause financial strain due to increased medical expenses and loss of income. Consider enlisting the help of a financial planner who has experience helping people with chronic medical conditions.
7. Cherish each other
Show compassion and empathy toward each other. Do something kind for each other, even if it’s something small. While dealing with chronic illness can be tough, remember that you are a team.
Karen Bruno. 7 Ways to Keep Your Relationship Strong Despite a Chronic Illness. WebMD: https://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/features/chronic-illness-seven-relationship-tips
Supporting a Spouse Through a Health Challenge. Johns Hopkins Medicine: https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/wellness-and-prevention/supporting-a-spouse-through-a-health-challenge
Quality of life: impact of chronic illness on the partner. NIH: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1282240/
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